How to influence people without realizing it

Our impact on others can come out of nowhere

Last week was the end of another year of teaching religion class at my church. This year’s group of ninth grade boys was, to say the least, a challenge.

Generally, they were nice enough kids, but at times, it was tempting to break the Fifth Commandment (thou shalt not kill).

The first few weeks started out okay. I was hopeful it would be another good year. Then they started randomly punching, pinching, and poking each other. They would interrupt me and each other during discussions. At one point, a water bottle went flying across the room.

After a stern lecture from me, that seemed to help — for about a week — then the poking and playful punching reappeared.

It went in cycles. They would be cooperative and respectful at one class. The next class, it was like the monkey cage at a zoo.

It is natural for kids to “test” their teachers to see what they can get away with. Sometimes it felt like this group made it a mission to try my patience. They were not mean or overtly rude — just mischievous.

Some days, I drove home wondering if I was losing my touch. The tactics that worked with past students did not seem to resonate with this group.